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Harry Potter Fan Fiction

"Statistics"

Posted on 2006.09.14 at 10:13
Tags: , ,
This is a sequel to "Surrogate".



Albus Potter-Weasley-Granger, aged 10, looked up from his Muggle-school "Social Studies" textbook at his parents.

"Mum, Dads, Jamie, listen to this!"

Harry and Hermione looked over from the Kitchen, where they were collaborating on a particularly complex spaghetti sauce.

Ron glanced over from the couch, where he had pulled his truncated torso, which ended in a smooth dome of freckled skin, just below the navel, from his silk-lined levitation cup, and was scratching his stump happily.

Nine-year-old Jamie looked over from his Chudley Cannons Pro Quidditch game, causing his tiny seeker to power-dive into the carpet, where she grumbled angrily, pulling her miniature broom out of the pile.

"It says here," said Albus, "That the average muggle family consists of two parents, and two-point-five children!"

"Muggles!" chuckled Ron, pulling himself back into the levitation cup. "They do everything backwards!"

Comments:


abovethestars
abovethestars at 2006-09-14 15:33 (UTC) (Link)
*snort*
good one!
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-14 15:43 (UTC) (Link)
Hee. Thanks!
xedra
xedra at 2006-09-14 17:28 (UTC) (Link)
Funny! Good names for the kids, too. :D
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-14 18:17 (UTC) (Link)
Glad to give you a chuckle!
mrsquizzical
mrsquizzical at 2006-09-14 20:12 (UTC) (Link)
yeah. cool.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-14 21:43 (UTC) (Link)
I've had this lame little joke floating in my head since the day I wrote "Surrogate." I just had to let it out.
mrsquizzical
mrsquizzical at 2006-09-14 22:39 (UTC) (Link)
not lame! funny joke!
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-15 09:39 (UTC) (Link)
Well, it's a lame funny joke. I like lame jokes.
elfwhistletree
elfwhistletree at 2006-09-14 21:39 (UTC) (Link)
Cute ♥
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-14 21:44 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks!
harry_lvr at 2006-09-15 03:43 (UTC) (Link)
lol! very cute :)
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-15 09:38 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks!
alloy_
alloy_ at 2006-09-15 08:50 (UTC) (Link)
A whole lot funnier after reading it's parent.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-15 09:37 (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, this is one of those completely dependent sequels. But, really as a vehicle for that one lame little gag, I couldn't weigh it down with too much backstory.
layla372
layla372 at 2006-09-15 20:06 (UTC) (Link)
That was cute.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-15 20:55 (UTC) (Link)
Glad you liked it!

Say, just out of curiosity, are you on-board for "Unbreakable Bond"? Or does it just not seem to be your cuppa?
layla372
layla372 at 2006-09-18 14:25 (UTC) (Link)
Actually I've been swamped by rl. Every time I get started I get interrupted. Hopefully this week I will get a chance to read it.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-18 14:47 (UTC) (Link)
Honestly, the nerve of some people who do things like eat, sleep, work for a living, take care of serious health problems, and otherwise fritter away their time when they could be here reading my stuff and stroking my ego! Priorities, people!

OK, now that I've done my cheap comedy, I'm glad to have your comments to look forward to, honestly, and I'm glad you'll be aboard! Hope you enjoy it!
pghpatronus
pghpatronus at 2006-09-16 18:13 (UTC) (Link)
Applause. Love it!
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2006-09-16 18:25 (UTC) (Link)
Heh heh! That family just begs for that gag, don't they?
shygryf
shygryf at 2007-01-05 07:21 (UTC) (Link)
very funny, I got a glare from my cat for waking him up.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-01-05 11:26 (UTC) (Link)
Ah, any time I can contribute to annoying a cat, it warms my heart!
Isha
isha_libran at 2007-02-01 13:44 (UTC) (Link)
Hee.
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-02-01 13:54 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks!
star54kar
star54kar at 2007-10-07 02:43 (UTC) (Link)
LOL!

That's extrodinarily funny:)
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-10-07 11:37 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks very much! You're dort of going backwards through, so you're meeting this tiny sequel before the first tale, which must be a little odd, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
star54kar
star54kar at 2007-10-07 15:02 (UTC) (Link)
LOL!

Nah, I just replied to them backwards, I read them in the correct order:P
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