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Annoyed Emma

Dear Asshat:

Posted on 2007.03.12 at 10:34
I have no problem with your need to use a couple of feet of toilet paper to make an impromptu "Sanitized for your protection" thingie on the seat. I can dig it; I watch "Monk."

But I am unable to fathom your lack of the skill or motivation to achieve a simple flush afterwards. Afraid of the germs on the lever? Grasp it with some toilet paper, then throw that in as the whirlpool starts. You tried flushing and were unsuccessful? Dude, there's a plunger right beside the bowl. Lift the seat, then plunge. Again, it isn't hard, and you can wrap TP around the handle as you grasp it if you really need to.

But don't leave the stall so that the next guy -- me, twice in the last week! -- has to collect your makeshift buttock-protection, flush your long-submerged turds, plunge the results, and otherwise clean up after you.

Honestly, don't be a fuckwit.

Yours,

Leviathan.

Comments:


Risie
risiepookie at 2007-03-12 16:12 (UTC) (Link)
Ugh, don't you just HATE that??? Seriously, some common courtesy (which, incidentally, seems to be more uncommon lately!) wouldn't kill some people...
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-03-12 16:22 (UTC) (Link)
Oh, God, I can't tell you! Real-life squicks!

And, yeah, simple basic human dignity seems to be becoming a lost art.
herrbgone
herrbgone at 2007-03-12 17:08 (UTC) (Link)
Ugh! It boggles the mind just how many people these days seem to need remedial potty training. Is there another one you can use besides the executive restroom? I figure it has to be management…
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-03-12 17:31 (UTC) (Link)
There's just one bathroom on this floor, and I resent taking an elevator so I can crap. Especially as the likelihood of flatulence in there is vastly higher, and that would make me the asshat.
Venessa
mudblood428 at 2007-03-12 18:36 (UTC) (Link)
HAHAHAHAHAAHA

I apologize if you aren't yet able to look back on this and laugh, but this is the funniest hypothetical letter I've read in a LONG time!
Jonathan Andrew Sheen
leviathan0999 at 2007-03-12 18:41 (UTC) (Link)
No, I'm totally seeing the humor. I almost always do, right off the bat, which is no help at all, by the way, in spousal disagreements of any kind.

So, glad you enjoyed it. I got to vent, so so did I.
mrsquizzical
mrsquizzical at 2007-03-12 21:26 (UTC) (Link)
oh so true!

because when hubby is funny and then you laugh and he says 'ha! you're LAUGHING! it's not that important afterall!' ... well then..... then i want to KILL him.... grrrrrrrrrr.

(*grins*)
louhq at 2007-03-14 14:30 (UTC) (Link)

Remdial toilet training

two cents:

1: When the boys were about three, I had a sign on the bathroom by the toilet that said "1) SHUT the toilet. 2) FLUSH the toilet. 3) WASH your hands." Guests thought it funny, but I didn't tell them that after the first couple of weeks, I left the sign up for THEM.

2: Ew. I could see you posting this on the inside of the bathroom stalls. It would be a public service.
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