"Well, Minister," said Arthur Weasley, "I can certainly understand your concerns. I'm quite sure it's been cursed."
Scrimgeour frowned at him. "All I want is a simple method of keeping up to date on Muggle news. With You-Know-Who out there raising holy hell with my constituency, I have to be able to be aware. That Muggle PM certainly isn't going to know enough to tell me what's significant and what isn't! Why is it you can't find me a single one of these that's not-- Are you sure they're all cursed?"
"Oh, absolutely, Minister!" Arthur bent over the device. A huge amount of wizard-hours had gone into warding this part of the Minister of Magic's office to allow Muggle electronics to work. He grabbed the-- What was it called again? The rat? The rat, and clicked on the screen.
A large grey box appeared there, reading, "You have performed an Illegal Operation!"
Arthur looked over at the Minister. "Now, millions of people have these, Minister, and clicking the Rat--"
"I believe that's what the muggles call it, sir. Anyway, clicking that thing is what makes it work, so it can hardly be illegal, now, can it?"
"Well, that other part, those pictures..." The Minister trailed off in a blush.
"Oh, dear," murmured Arthur. "Well, I'm not sure those are actually illegal, per se, although certainly highly improper, I agree..."
"And they just appeared?"
"Well, no, Minister. We were searching for those stolen children from Barkesdeale Hospital For Feverish Infants," said Arthur.
"Still," said Scrimgeour, "those were hardly what I'd call 'Hot Babes!'"
Arthur moved the mouse again, and the screen turned blue, filling with some sort Advanced Arithmancy.
"There! D'you see it? Look at the complexity of that curse! I've had Vector looking at it, and he's simply vexed! Still there seems to be a way to clear it!"
Arthur very carefully splayed his fingers, so he could press three of the strangely arrayed buttons on the device at the same time, and a grey box appeared with three smaller boxes in it. These read, "Abort," "Retry" and "Fail." Arthur moved the rat till the little symbol on the screen was over "Abort" and the blue curse disappeared, replaced once again with a picture of a blue sky with clouds floating in it. One by one, tiny pictures began to appear on the screen, while an annoying, semi-musical tone played.
"Oh, I can't bear it anymore, how do I turn it off?"
"Ah, well, that's the final nail in the coffin, isn't it Minister?" said Arthur. "To turn it off, you have to click here, where it says 'Start!'"
"Oh, Merlin! And you say they're all like this?"
"All the ones we've found, Minister!"
"It's stunning! And you say you haven't ever found this wizard associated with Death Eaters?"
"Well, Minister, the Americans seem quite dependent on these cursed machines for their record-keeping. We'll never be able to prove it. But I'm quite convinced of it, sir. This Bill Gates fellow is one of the most awful Dark Wizards of our times!"
Happy Birthday, puguita!